Welcome to this blog post.
That sounds a bit silly, but I mean it from the bottom of my heart. You are so welcome because if you are reading this, then you are a survivor. You have chosen to be here, rather than to go away. You have decided to acknowledge whatever demons or challenges that may have held you back up to this point, and to do something about them. You may not even be sure yet what that 'something' is, but you are not going to do nothing.
This makes you a hero and I extend a warm welcome to you to this blog. You are our kind of person.
Today, I learned that a local mother of three has taken her own life. I don't know this lady. I barely know her children and it was a very upset friend of mine, who knows the family, who told me this evening this awful news.
I kept thinking, as I drove home in my car, of the colossal loss this poor woman's death means for the community. I cannot begin to imagine how her children and her husband feel...it is so huge a tragedy that I literally cannot fathom it from their perspective. However, what I was able to consider was the finality of the method this lady chose to put an end to her sadness and the tremendous waste of a life of which this is an example. I just thought: If only she had held on, even in the absence of any belief that there would be any improvement in her state of mind. If only she had just not taken the actions which led to her death.
It takes more patience than the word can even conjure to hold on, when one is in that dark, dark place. I know this because I have been there. But I held on. I did not act. This is the best example of inaction imaginable.
I am here, typing this, for someone...maybe only one person, but someone...to read. Maybe you feel a little more hopeful for reading it. Maybe no one will ever read it. But if I had acted on my feelings years ago, I would have removed all possibility of ever sitting here, creating the chance that I might help someone.
Suicide can seem like the best option when we are faced with problems that seem bigger than any solution of which we can think. But it is the worst possible option. It is the worst action ever. You have not resorted to that. You have chosen life, up to now. I hope so strongly that I cannot put it into words that you continue to choose life over the alternative.
Just hold on. There is light at the end of the tunnel, even if you can't see it. It is there, it may be visible just around the next corner. Hold on and see if I'm right. Don;t go anywhere. You are too precious. One day, you will realise what a hero you are, just for staying here.
Thank you so much for reading this.
Thank you for being here, to read it.