Learning to re-focus

What you focus on grows.

If I were to ask you to focus on something, for example the peacock, your mind would be filled with the image of the peacock and the colour. Your concentration would be directed on the bird. The more time you spent thinking about it, the more your thoughts would develop about the peacock - what it was doing, where it was etc. 
More time = more thoughts. 
Where am I going with this, you might think? 
Well the same principle applies to negative thinking. 

If we slip into the dark abyss of negativity, we may find ourselves plummeting right to the bottom of it. You may think that it happens 'all of a sudden', but it doesn't always. Sometimes the sinking is a consequence of feeding the negativity, nourishing it and letting it grow. When our minds begin to race and the negative onslaught begins, it is usually compounded by more negativity. Which then leads us to the bottom of that dark pool.
So how do we stop it?

Simple. Do not feed the negativity. 
Do not focus on it. 
Register the negative thought but react to it by shutting the negative invader down. 
Somebody once said to me before, change the reaction to your reaction and then take action. It sounds like a mouthful, but it makes so much sense. 
Your reaction to a situation may be to berate yourself and think negatively. Instead of reacting to that negativity with more negativity, treat yourself with compassion. 
What I mean is, when the negativity comes, choose to react to it by being kind to yourself and then physically doing something to distract yourself in a non-destructive manner. Distraction is a great cure to the stubborn negativity. 

What I find are really great distractions are the things that I am passionate about or that I enjoy doing. Here is a list of some feel-good distractions. Try a few out until you find which one you enjoy doing or that works for you. If none on the list appeal to you, do try to think of something you might like because with the negativity, there is always an excuse not to do something so ensure that you get up and DO IT anyway :)

Watch a movie - 
movies are great distractions. Allow yourself to become immersed in the storyline and your thoughts will only be consumed by the plot of the movie

Get creative - 
you might discover or re-discover a talent that you have. And even if you think that you're 'not a creative person', here me when I say this - everyone has the ability to be creative!! You can try - gardening, cooking, dancing, drawing, painting (paint by numbers are great!!), photography, sewing, writing, wood-work, lego-building, anything that you think might be interesting!

Listen to music - 
it can fill your ears with words that aren't your own negativity. Listen to music that makes you feel lighter however, and not wallow

Do some house-work - 
this may sound ridiculous to you but it is a very satisfying thing. It gives you a sense of accomplishment and at the same time distracts you! 

Watch a TV programme - 
there are so many to choose from, pick one that you enjoy and switch it on. If you don't have a TV, the internet has great websites like Netflix that have an endless choice of things to watch

Read a book - 
go to your local library or bookshop and pick up a book to read. Reading is a fantastic way to distract your mind as your imagination is being used to create the world of the story the way only you can uniquely see

Whichever distraction you find works for you, do it and do it often. Give yourself plenty of credit for taking the action and changing your reaction to the reaction. 

Do not linger on the negativity and you will reap the rewards of your efforts in feeling a lot lighter and a lot more at peace. 

You deserve more than the negative thoughts that encroach your mind.

Enjoy distracting yourself :)

Dare to Live SOS


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